Hackmaster episode 52


So R&R in the crawlspace. it ain''t comfy, and it's sorta crowded as our Party now consists of:

Noddy, Hero Topps, Gingersnap Glitterwing, Finn, Arnott Tim Tam, Stagger Lee, Tim the Torch Bearer, Little Timmy Dib Dib Dib, Eldwina (the escaped slave), Porter Tim, Dingwald, Victor Kaching and Tim Mc Stumpy.

 

But we sleep and heal, and pray and study and are finally ready to reenter the fray, at which point GG suggest that we flee on account of his thumb which was cut off by red guy and currently resides in his belt pouch.

 

Which we do, strangely discovering that none of our hacking and busting and stealing and freeing seem to have been noticed in the 10 or so hours that have passed since we were last here.

 

Going back the way we had come we recheck the gnollish barracks, discovering 5 sleeping figures where we had left but 3 corpses. Noddy sneaks in and slits the throat of the first sleeper, noticing too late that it's pallid, flyblown and doesn't bleed. But eventually he finds a live one and predictably fluffs his throat slitting. Our gnoll goes for the halberd he slipped under the pillow but doesn't quite reach it before Glitterwing stabs teh poor sap. Arnie asks HT for advise, but HT ignores his protege and wastes the gnoll. Our proteges all note that a halberd under the pillow is surprisingly ineffective and that daggers and short swords are probably a safer bet.

 

Another gnoll has awoken and reached his battle ax but drops it and cowers. For some reason we take pity on this brute, where just a few hours ago the littlist kobold had been casually slaughtered. Soem are reluctant to use perfectly good rope to tie him (notably those who are fairly keen on killing him) and hamstringing and nailing to the floor are seriously debated as good options. But he is simply tied and gagged and chucked in the pantry with the corpses.

 

HT notices a barrel of liquor in the pantry and hits on the genius idea of making teh gnoll completely paralytic. This plan is forgotten as GG notices the alcohol and dive in headfirst, surfaceing only to breathe and eventually dragging hmiself out, slipping down the side and batting his eyes at Eldwina. Noddy, though in love, takes no offense at the drunken PF, and Eldwina doesn't either, really. GG attempts to borrow Tim Mc Stumpy's sleeping quarters but everyone ignores him, except her, who objects, gently. HT tries to hit on her too, but everyone ignores him, the lovestruck droning being indistinguishable from his standard droning.

 

The ladies honour still intact we venture forward. GG drunkenly weaving down the corridor, bouncing off walls, and singing gently to himself.

 

"Oh my name is Gingersnap

I'm a canny gaun man

but a rovin' young fellow I've been

so be easy and free

when you're drinking wi' me

I'm a faerie you don't meet every day"

 

Noddy manages to ignore this while opening the next door, which GG flits into and starts exploring. About then a green slime thing falls on him and burns his clothes off with a sizzling sound. He's confused about why he didn't detect the lifeforce of this thing, but meets with shrugs and then forgets his problems as he notices his nakedness. Covering himself he attempts to launch into flight and then notices that his two, beautiful, iridescent wings are dissolved in a puddle on the floor.

 

He takes this badly, though he sulks more than screams in bitter panic, which seems an odd reaction. His renewed demand to flee falls on deaf ears and he reluctantly leads the way, somewhat quieter than before and riding on Hero Topps' shoulder.

 

Finally we reach an interesting door with the sounds of whipping and screaming eminating from it. The fourteen members and hangers on of Descarte shuffle and bang around the corridor sorting ouselves out and by the time Noddy finally opens the door and leaps out of the way a curious hobgoblin is standing there. GG immediately realises that standing on a humans shoulder to enter combat isn't taht useful when you have a reach of about 8 inches. He hangs on to HTs ear and sulks some more. But the hobgoblin goes down damn fast, as does another that sneaks up to the rear of the party.

 

We release the manacled and whipped elven lass and this time eventually remember to ask her name - Chryena - she doesn't seem wildly glad to have been rescued and there is some question of quite what was going on, but well we're in the business of saving the world so she's added to the list of hangers on. We also loot some nifty stuff.

 

Again, the small army thumps down the hall, until a section of wall peels off and smacks Finn, stunning him. This rock creature thing seems tough as, but we finally chip it into dust without losses (though Dingwald, his wounds from red guy sadly ignored by his Mentor Noddy, would have died horribly had he not cacked his pants and fled combat).

 

Eventually we crunch back to another room which is filed with a half-dozen Hbgoblins hastily building defneces from beds. Hero Topps' learned critique of their techniques, along with a well-placed fireball from Stagger Lee convince them that attacking is their only hope. But it isn't and they go down in a heap of smoke and blood and gore. Though GG manages to charge into the fray and get one blow in before it's all over. He seems happioer, though slightly out of breath through the unaccustomed use of his legs.

 

He mutters something about hoping that something will shear everyone else legs off so they'll know what it's like to have no wings. Sulkiness is finally turning to bitterness and vindictiveness. A good sign that he is again noticing the world around him and not thinking only of himself. We proceed, heartened.

 

Then we find this uge icy cold chamber with rows of half frozen stupefied slaves chained by the neck in tiers. And a lone hobgoblin. Who dies. Unchaining and taking the slaves somewhere a little warmer seems to revive those that haven't already died and so we leave them in a couple of cleared rooms with some proteges and hangers on to defend them and continue. Despite the objections of GG that we should bail, now.

 

The trussed gnoll is halfway through escaping so we admonish him and tie him back up. And GG has aother drink - to ease the pain, you understand.

 

GG meets a pixie faerie and, blind to the possibility that, being free and comfortable in a slavers fortress, it's an evil slaver PF engages it in conversation while Stagger fingers his components. Then Noddy asks who the PF and the PF says 'Black Rose' and seemingly notices our battered and blood encrusted selves, weapons and armour and asks who we are. And then he disappears and there's a lot of screanming to shut the damn door. And then one of those bloody irritating combats against invisible things take place, ending when this little dragon thing that keeps trying to bite us is finally shot out of the air with a magic missle and whacked by HT.

 

GG leaps upon the unconscious critter to prevent HT squishing it and tries to give it mouth to mouth. But he's totally drunk and doesn't have a clue of what he's doing, so it dies.

 

HT and SL note a puch lifting off the table and vanishing and negotiations with the critters PF master take place:

 

Black Rose: "I'll give you these gems if you let me live"

GG: "*hic*, sho thing, yesh"

HT: "I cannot tell a lie, if I see you I'll kill you"

Black Rose: (silence)

 

But knowing something of Pixie Faeries we know there's no way he can stay invisible for ever and there's no way out so we decide to wait the little bugger out.

 

Finn, who's still on the outside of the door gets bored of all this waiting, being inexperienced and eager to prove himself and sneaks off down the hall. He meets something and after a stilted and ineffectual explanation that he's "Chef Tim, and what do you want for dinner?" fless back pursued by a bunch of hobgoblins.

 

The inevitable occurs, with the few proteges remaining with us attacked by a dozen hobgoblins in a conga line of death. Which works quite nicely really, as we're able to exit the room and lay into the rear of them. Surrounded and outgunned they're toast, though Finn almost dies. Oh, and GG breaks his petite rapier, causing more cursing, sulking and gnashing of crescent-shaped bony-ridges.

 

During this a pixie faerie crawls from beneath the bed and tries to flee into the corridor, but he's smashed from the eair by Noddy and falls in a crumpled heap. Stagger Lee grabs the corpse and a wand he was carrying and ransacks the room again searching fo magic stuff.

 

GG accuses Stagger Lee of theft, which is sorta weird, but he's forgiven due to his troubled circumstances (no thumb, no wings, a broken rapier and unfulfilled desire to "escort the rescued slaves to town" )