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Hackmaster episode 65

Page history last edited by PBworks 14 years, 8 months ago

Tha Log


An old harflyng kawld Almaw cam up too us in a pub, and haird us to eskawt hym to tha Pyxe Fare Met.

We travyld of too the met witch was ova tha Kron Hyls. The fyrst too das wos ese travlyng threw cyvylisd parts, but gradjyle the rod grew maw wild.


The thyrd da we wyr travlyng along wn we kam akros a travlyng salsmyn wyth a byg karavan. He wos selyng majyk poshyns, but hys priss wyr step. I desidd too bi wun newa and haggyld hym down too harf pris, but I got Staga Le to chek too se if it wos genuin. Staga Le rekynd it wos mewl pys, so I demandd my mune bak and suprisyngle got it.


We travldd on wyth Almaw's mewl tran. Tha next da we left tha man rod and went ontoo a smawlyr rod. Arfta jernyyng down tha rod faw a byt we spid too battyrd men cumyng toowards us.


Thay told us that tha had ben ambushd by a hawd of dwawvs hoo had robd them of awl thayr poseshyns. I wos sore faw them so gav them a few sylva pess to help them on thayr way. Fyn wos also sore faw them, and a byt soft in tha head, so he gav them a byg fystful of gold pess.


A short tim arfta, wil we wyr etyng lunch we wyr yntyruptd bi tha hawd of dwawvs. Tha lookd vyre angre and rede faw a lynchyng. Thay sayd that tha too men had rypd them off. We let them go on thayr way.


That nit we wyr atakd bi a paltre ragd band of fune hard-men, harf-vultchyr, harf-betyl thyngs. We kyld them awl and went bak too slep.


We travyld faw anutha da. As nit fel it startdd to ran. It wos not vere nis, so Almaw and I went of too look faw shelta (and mushrooms faw dynar). Ova a hyl we kam too a lak, and on tha utha sid of the lak we saw a byg haus. So Almaw and I went bak and then led the parte to the haus to sek shelta.


It wos a byg statle mana, saraundd bi a wal wyth an iyn gat. In the mud in front of tha gat wos a sin sayyng "Anauns yawself and enta." Staga Le dyd so, and we awl folod hym in (I anaunsd miself vere kwiytle).


Almaw went of wyth hys mewls to tha barn, wil we went up too tha man entryns. Nowun ansyrd owr nok so we opynd the daws and went in. Thay suddynle slamd behind us and wyr majykle lokd.


We wyr in a grand entryns room wyth too byg stars, and lots of daws ledyng owt. Thar wos a shandyleer smashd on the flaw in the mydl of the room, and on ethyr sid of the entryns wyr dwarv or nom sisd soots of platmal rma stufd wyth twygs.


We desidd too explaw. Wot tha hel els wyr we goyng to do I supos u cud ask. We opynd a daw and wyr atakd bi a smawl skalytun, but Fyn & Jynjursnap smashd it to byts. We wyr presentdd wyth a long karydaw wyth mane daws of it. It was vere nisle panyld in wood. Wyth lots of sum sort of heraldyk bag awl ova tha plas.


We fawnd that on ethur sid of the karydaw wyr sets of rooms. Too bedrooms witch both opendd onto a prive betwen them. Ther were six sets I thynk, too on etch sid. We lootyd a byt of stuf. Then in the fifth one we fownd a flash lookyng helmet on a bed. Jynjursnap went to pyk it up (it wos shine, in cas u wyr wundyryng), and the bed suddynle reveld a huj naste mawth ful of teth and tridd to gobyl hym up. We smashd it.


Then in the next wun in the prive we kam akros wot aperd to be an elf pewkyng into the dune. Jynjursnap tapd hym on hys sholda and inkwird arfta hys halth. The elf spund arawnd and we saw wyth hora that ther was a vin kumyng owt of hys i witch dysaperd into the toylyt.


Tha elf kast a spel at us, so we atakd hym. Jynjursnap sevyrd the vin and the elf colapsed layflysle. Then Jynjursnap (faw sum unfathumabyl Pixe Fare resun) grabd the vin and trid to pul it owt of the bog. I told hym that if he wos rarle luke he wood end up wyth a vin cuvyrd in shyt, but I had no ideer wot he wood get if he wos unluke, and just as I fynyshd telyng hym the vin puld hym ynto the bog and the toylyt set majykle seld itself ova hym.


We hyrd awl sorts of krashyng and bashyng from indid tha loo, so Fyn and I set abowt hakyng thru the toylyt set. It wos hard, but finale we hakd thru onle to se the smooth pynk thi of a hewmun womun. We hakd furtha and thar wos a Valkyre, such as cood ben sumynd by owr Horn of the Valkyres witch Jynjursnap insysted on caryyng. The hol loo was stufd ful of Valkyrees. We puld them owt and fawnd Jynjursnap awl swete and brewsd stuk betwen the impresyv bosoms of the last wun. He klamdd that the toylyt had atakd hym, and he had to sumyng the Valkyrees to sav them.


Levyng the loo we kam to a kawna of the koredaw, wyth too daws ledyng of it. Tha led ynto a bathroom. I went faw a look, and sudynle the daw slamd behind me trappyng me insid. Then wata startdd too paw into the baths, wyth no obveus outlyt. I was a trifyl wured, but fortchewnutle mi stowt kompanyins forsd an exyt by hakyng trew the daw, wych reformdd itself arfta I had left.

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